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The ultimatum is emotional torture porn, and that’s okay!

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picture: Lana Panich-Linsman/Netflix

Aside from jumping into the premiere episode of love is blind to let us know that heapparentlyNick Lachey, the 98 Degrees singer and his wife, model and TV host Vanessa Lachey, haven’t really done much in terms of hosting duties. But the couple has a bigger role to play in hosting her latest Netflix reality series, The ultimatum: get married or move on. The new show offers another entertainingly experiential approach to finding love, one that the presenters and contestants insist on for emotional growth and the strengthening of relationships. To which I say, could we kindly cut the crap off?

Watching people come engaged to someone they’ve never met felt wild The ultimatum might love is blind seem downright tame. The series consists of six couples, and one member of each couple has given their partner the ultimatum that gives the show its title: They either want to get engaged or quit. Before deciding on another path, the couples swap partners with the other couples and live together in their new pairings for three-week “trial marriages” to see if the grass is really greener on the other side.

“Psychologists agree that an ultimatum isn’t a good way to get someone else to do what you want,” Lachey tells candidates early on, “but it’s the best way to give you the answers, you need, and on a schedule you can live with.” I’m not a doctor, but I’d be genuinely surprised if there’s a psychologist on this planet who thinks that attending this or any other Dating show is a recommended way to build a healthy relationship.

What makes the show deeply worth watching is the fact that Netflix doesn’t allow the cast to meet new people while keeping their original partners at a respectable distance, leading to some pretty nightmarish scenarios. Imagine watching your long-term partner date someone else while you’re sitting across the room. Imagine going to a girls’ night out with friends, only to have another woman notice that your boyfriend is getting hard at bedtime. Please yell if any of this sounds like the building blocks of the kind of healthy, monogamous relationships the show is supposed to build.

Nevertheless, the series maintains a pseudo-therapeutic claim throughout. In episode two, as contestants choose which virtual stranger they want their partners to leave for, Lachey surveys the room full of emotionally troubled 20-year-olds and says, “If you didn’t have feelings right now, I would send you to the hospital and check you out the pulse. You should be feeling all these things that you are feeling.” It’s like throwing someone into a wood chipper while nodding empathetically and saying you understand what they’re going through.

“The hardest thing is putting jealousy aside,” Vanessa advises at one point. “But also having faith.” If someone ended up getting dumped, “Thank God you did that now and not after you were married and had two kids,” she said. The claim that sharing a bed with an attractive stranger for three weeks is some kind of essential test for couples whose ultimate goal is monogamy and marriage is truly ludicrous.

The series is the most chaotic of all chaos, a show so absorbing that I didn’t devour it, I breathed it in. and The ultimatum is is far from alone in infusing his highly dramatic manipulations with a self-help icing through chatter about feelings, growth, and healthy relationships; Pretty much every other reality dating show does this too. But we don’t have to keep up appearances. Contestants are looking for fun, fame, and a chance to meet some hot people. The spectators come for the spectacle, the hosts for the control. We’re grown ups – let’s be honest.

https://jezebel.com/netflix-the-ultimatum-reality-tv-1848765272 The ultimatum is emotional torture porn, and that’s okay!

Andrew Schnitker

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