Elon Musk sells “Burnt Hair” perfume that cannot be delivered on bullet trains

Elon Musk’s Twitter bio currently reads “perfume salesman,” which is an accurate description as of this week. It’s also fitting that it reads “notions,” “flamethrower peddler,” “jimador,” or even “short shorts seller.” Speaking of which, he could also call himself a “Bad Negotiator,” “Failed Tunnel Erector,” or “Exploding Car Clerk.” At what point will this guy’s reputation for not executing his ideas and slapping squat novelty gag gifts with his logo on them overwhelm this image some people hold of him as a savvy entrepreneur? Not soon enough!! In the meantime, we’ll all be exposed to his perfectly understated sense of humor.

Yesterday Musk released a perfume called “Burnt Hair” which he describes as “The Essence of Repugnant Desire”. Musk, whose own hair miraculously reappeared in 2002, clearly thinks he’s very funny. In fact, his own obsession with his sense of humor might be the most obnoxious thing about him. His last name is Musk! He sells perfume! The smell of perfume is notoriously one of the worst smells known to man! To quote my 9-year-old self, “It’s so funny I forgot to laugh.” Billionaires, for the record, can’t be funny because they are the force to which comedic truth is spoken. (I recommend that New York Times Piece about Musk from yesterday about him tried unsuccessfully to make Nathan Fielder laugh if you want to experience glee at its best.)

But sure, a lot of people – 10,000 from them, about – want to be in on the joke. has musk did over a million dollars for the stuff in less than a day, selling “Burnt Hair” for $100 a piece. The perfume won’t ship until early 2023, so no word on how much of a hilarious scam this whole thing is.

As I mentioned earlier, Musk also made money from the sale flamethrower, tequila, Booty shortsand hats. A painter sold a Tesla surfboard for $1,500. While Musk is making some money, albeit a fraction of its worth, from setting up an accessories shop not dissimilar to that of an Instagram influencer, his core business plans are imploding. In some cases, like his Tesla cars, they are explodes. He has been for months to play hot potato with twitter. The Boring Company, which sells perfume, flamethrowers and hats, should be noted has already to actually accomplish what it was created to do: build a high-speed train system.

What Musk has made successful is something many, many smart musicians have also mastered: pitching a big, life-changing project with no commitments or plans to actually make it happen. Believe me, I’ve dated a lot of bass players. I recognize this trick.

But as long as his followers, who have formed this obsessive parasocial relationship with him and who believe he is God’s gift to techpreneurs, maintain their adoration for him, he will have an audience and a customer base for his downright stupid gags. And as long as he has that base, he will continue to bounce between opportunities to exploit people, guided by his idea of ​​himself as a hilarious guy and a technical innovator. I repeat myself: He is neither nor!