Easily triggered? Transfer your pulsating anger directly to cyclists

The trick, according to the expert, is to create your own “wellness plan”. Here’s how to identify the insidious, daily stress points that can be wrecking your brain. In the past, hard-working professionals were confronted with the vicissitudes of life, took them calmly and believed that they were the normal drama of everyday life.

But you would be wrong to do that. Because you could be accumulating suppressed anger that will inevitably find an outlet and explode at any moment, with potentially catastrophic consequences for relationships, your work life, and the way you interact with your dog or cat.

Instead, you should create your personal wellness plan and analyze what’s happening in real time, take a “me break,” or perhaps put on your headphones and listen to one of Classic FM’s soothing music collections, such as “Moonlight Sonata.”

I think this is a great idea and have started creating my own wellness plan to help me overcome life’s little challenges before they send me into a state of psychotic self-loathing.

Pedal nonsense
MY wellness plan begins with a list of those triggers that, if left unaddressed, can ruin my head.
Cyclist. To the unwary, these gentle and unassuming street snails are just well-meaning guys with too much time on their hands, seeking fresh air and exercise amid the majesty of Scotland’s wild spaces.

Then you begin to realize that you will soon be too late to make the work contribution to society that you seem to be avoiding.

Worse, your carbon footprint goes from a manageable size six to a dangerous size ten as you slow down and your engine uses more gas, along with the long line of cars behind you.

In my personal wellness plan, I have now decided to take a deep breath before gently walking past the cyclists and taking a position directly in front of them. And then the speed slows down to about two miles per hour.

In this way you transfer your pulsating anger directly to her. You only need to do this for about three minutes. But it will lead to better mental health outcomes knowing that you have given these insidious and hypocritical weapons a taste of their own medicine.

Really annoying
ALSO at the top of the list of triggers for my personal wellness plan are left-wing politicians who describe themselves as socially enlightened, but at the same time have a deep dislike for stock market speculators. The trigger usually occurs when they say the phrase “produce positive results.”

This silly sophistry was propagated among Scotland’s political and media elite last week when Lord Advocate Dorothy Bain declared that it was not in the public interest to prosecute drug users for simple possession offenses committed in a “safer drug use” pilot facility.” .

This is an ideal outcome for our bourgeois elites. It keeps those they think are worthless idiots drugged (but not over-the-top) in a controlled environment.

And it saves them the cost of actually healing and changing their lives by providing them with appropriate rehab beds.

Those enacting and celebrating zombie legislation tend to be wealthy, middle-class politicians and media figures who couldn’t find the streets where Scotland’s problem addicts live with a sat-nav.

And keeping them in a controlled, state-sponsored anesthesia also makes them much less likely to ask troubling questions about the callous refusal of our governments and legal officials to help cure drug addiction.

Win-win, as they say about artisanal lattes in their G12 salons.

Passion killer
Another trigger in my personal plan for unhappiness is politicians trying to show that they are all twice as ambitious and dirty by embracing the polite pastimes of punters.

Personally, I don’t care at all whether people boo the British national anthem at football games or not. I’m also all for mocking Flower Of Scotland – or anything else that expresses “patriotism”.

What gets on my nerves is when politicians are asked their opinion on this and then take the opportunity to tell us that if they didn’t legislate and debate, they would be sitting on the terraces in saltires and the wreck -the-Hoose would drink juice and gave it to the English.

The rest of the time they are bowing to the London House of Windsor or drinking whiskey with English aristocrats at the Palace of Westminster.

You’re about as convincing as a ghost hunter gets.